SHELFARI

I've added my Shelfari shelf. As I look, I am amazed at the number of books I have read ( and I got tired of adding...I am not even half way done! ) More amazed that I OWN, in hardback form, 99% of the books you see on the shelves. ( I am buried under books.) Run your curser over the books for a surprise :) And yes, I am aware they are nearly all horror books. Get yer own shelf and fill it with what ever YOU are reading...I highly recommend you do so.

Inconclusive

The tests are inconclusive. My daughter is, for all intents and purposes, paralyzed from the waist down...and the tests are inconclusive. While I am greatly relieved her MRI's came back clean, it doesn't change the fact that she is still in constant pain, still incapacitated. I don't want her to have something dire, but FFS, she needs a diagnosis..we all do, so she can be treated for what she actually has, not what she may have. Ugh. I am just frustrated for her. Her new Dr. is agressive and throrough; he upped her anti-spastic meds. and ordered a spinal tap. Next is an in-visit to the Cleveland Clinic and/or the University of Mich. We are all just so tired of the 'hurry up and wait' routine. Damn it. :(

Are You the Key Master?

For the millionth time, my hsb. can't find his keys. It is always the same.."Do you have my keys? Have you seen my keys? Did you move my keys? Where in the hell are my keys?!" Usually it takes place at 4 a.m. as he is leaving for work. WTF? Why doesn't he just hang his keys up like a normal person? BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE TOO EASY. This is an ongoing habit of his that drives me insane. For Valentine's Day one year, I bought him a huge, HUGE key ring that said " Just try to lose this one, honey!" and a sweatshirt that said "Have YOU seen my keys?". He seems to have lost both of those as well.

I am not looking for the keys, I don't want to, he can't make me..so there. Hmph. :p

Dear Marjorie

Hello Audrey - you don't know me but through a very circuitous route I ended up here on your blog tonight. After enjoying so many of your stories, artwork and humor, I came upon this post and was saddened to learn of your daughter's illness. I understand how much the heart can hurt and I could feel your anguish and pain. I just wanted to say that I do hope your daughter is feeling better and that things are improving... you both will be in my thoughts and prayers,
Marjorie





Dear Marjorie,
Though I am not Audrey, I thank you so very much for your kind words. I am Aud's blog partner, it is my daughter who is ill. She will get the results of her latest tests on Thursday...please keep her in your thoughts.

Thankfully, Aud's only child is well and happy, down on the farm :)

I posted this in my comment section, but was afraid you might miss it.

Thursday, 9 am

test results. My head is going to explode before then, I swear it.

I need a new motto

Well, I do. My most recent motto/mantra seems to be "Fuck Me"... and not said or meant in any enjoyable way .


I am thinking of using the new one below; I like it, it suits me hahahaaaa

Errors have been made, others will be blamed. :z

More, More, More crazy names

I got to thinking..I actually know some of these people. Well, not celebs, but people who have given their offspring cringe worthy names.

LIKE>>>>>>>>



Navada Durnwald ( a boy, his mother is just. not. right. )



London and Bridge ( 2 different children, same family )



Charlie ( a girl, this is her first name )



Frankie ( a girl..luckily for her, it is just a nickname..full name is Francesca )



DeNeil ( a girl I grew up with )



Cayman and Cayenne ( girls, named for the island and the spice..don't ask )



Jammie ( first name, girl my daughter went to school with..pronounced Jam-mee )



Jazz ( boy, child of daughter's best friend )



Lux ( girl )


Juwanna ( a girl , so named by a friend I went to school with; I tried in vain to stop her, knowing she would get "Juwanna f*ck? by the time she was in highschool. And she did get teased to the point she used her middle name from then on. )



I did manage to discourage my delivery guy from naming his son "J'. His reasoning was: he'll always know how to spell his name, it's easy to remember, no one else has that name. Ummm, unless you are one of the MIB*, you don't call your kid by just an initial. And if your kid requires just an initial to remember his name, there are bigger issues you need to deal with. Kid got named Blake.



And I haven't even scratched the surface. Before learning the baby was a boy, my SIL had

'LUCY LU" picked out for a girl. Wanted to call her 'LuLu" WTF?? The boy got a normal name, thanks to my brother.







MIB*= Men In Black

WTF were they thinking?

Do celebrities sign a contract promising to name their offspring ridiculous names? I mean, does having fame and or money, really entitle you to saddle your child with some hideous moniker? These kids better be seriously great looking..and pack a good right hand. Not that there aren't some fucked up old names..take Dorcas for instance. Or Nimrod ( yeah..it's an actual name!) Bertha, Bulah, Agnes...*shudders* But some of these new, made-up names, are just wrong on so many levels...I didn't run into a Female' or numbers or symbols ( Prince, aside ) for names..yet...
There are websites dedicated to these atrocities against children... :p

I like this one

I've listed the parental units responsible for these tragedies.

Don't even get me started on Michael Jackson :x

Dolly Rebecca Rose and Charlie Tamara Tulip (Jerry O'Connell )

Bronx Mowgli ( Ashley Simpson )

Bluebell Madonna: Geri Halliwell

Brooklyn: David and Victoria Beckham (also parents to Romeo and Cruz)

Gaia: Emma Thompson and Greg Wise

Gulliver: Gary Oldman and Donya Fiorentino

Heaven: Lil' Mo (also mother to God'Iss Love Stone)

Liberty: Ryan Giggs

London Emilio: Slash

Luna Coco Patricia: Frank Lampard and Elen Rive

Marquise: 50 Cent

Rufus Tiger: Roger Taylor also father to Tiger Lily and Lola Daisy

Saffron Sahara: Simon and Yasmin Le Bon (also parents to Amber Rose and Tallulah Pine)

Sage Moonblood: Sylvester Stallone and Sasha Czack (also parents to Seargeoh)

Satchel: Spike Lee and Tonya Lewis Lee

Seven Sirius: Andre Benjamin and Erykah Badu

Shiloh Nouvel: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie

Sosie: Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick

Suri: Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes

Zola Ivy: Eddie Murphy and Nicole Mitchell

MORE:

Apple (Gwyneth Paltrow & Coldplay's Chris Martin)


Blue Angel (U2's The Edge)


Fifi Trixiebelle, Peaches Honeyblossom and Pixie (Bob Geldof)


Caledonia (Shawn Colvin)


Camera (Arthur Ashe)


Moon Unit, Dweezil, and Diva Muffin (Frank Zappa)


Sailor Lee (Christie Brinkley)


Puma (Erykah Badu)


Memphis Eve (U2's Bono)


Rumer and Tallulah Belle, Scout (Bruce Willis & Demi Moore)


Prima Sellechia (John Tesh & Connie Selleca)


Tu (Rob Morrow)


Reignbeau (Ving Rhames)


Moxie Crimefighter (Penn Gillette of Penn & Teller)


Calico (Alice Cooper)


Lark Song (Mia Farrow)


Willow Camille Reign (Will Smith & Jada Pinkett)


Destry (Steven Spielberg and Kate Capshaw)


LaPrincia (Bobby Brown)

Heavenly Hiranna Tiger Lily - (Michael Hutchence of INXS)

Fuchsia (Sting)


More Stupid boy names

Aja (Shania Twain)

Kal-El (named after Superman) (Nicolas Cage)


Banjo (Rachel Griffiths)


Audio Science (Shannyn Sossaman)


Aurelius Cy (Elle Macpherson)


Bamboo (Outkast's Big Boi)


Bow-Ty (50 Cent)


Dweezil and Ahmet (Frank Zappa)


Free (David Carradine & Barbara Hershey)


Jermajesty (Jermaine Jackson)


Zowie (David Bowie)


Zolten (Penn Gillette of Penn & Teller)


Pilot Inspektor (Jason Lee)


Racer, Rocket, Rebel and Rogue (Robert Rodriguez). He also has a daughter, Rhiannon.

Freedom (Ving Rhames)


Denim Cole and Diezel Ky (Toni Braxton)


Seven Sirius (Andre 3000 & Erykah Badu)


Hud and Spec Wildhorse (John Cougar Mellencrap)


Atlanta (Duran Duran's John Taylor)


Thyme (Emma Thompson)


Homer James Jigme (Richard Gere & Carey Lowell)


Indiana August (Casey Affleck)



Ocean (Forest Whitaker)


Jaz (Andre Agassi)


Messiah Ya'Majesty (rapper T.I.)

How did this happen?

Yes, though it doesn't appear to matter..I have been MIA. Here is the reason:
My beloved daughter, my only child, is seriously ill. My heart hurts; I have never felt so helpless, so useless, in all of my life. I find that I now have tunnel vision: nothing else is as important as her getting well, nothing; everything else hinges on this fact. I am consumed with thoughts of how to make her well, how to help her. Please pray for my girl.

2000fucking9

Isn't shaping up to be a stellar year..and it is only the 3rd day. My daughter is ill,desperately ill. I feel helpless and stupid; I divide my time between trying to help, crying, and being a total bitch. :( Hope your year is off to a much better start.